Photo by Austin Chan on Unsplash
Let Them See Me
See me. Lately I have just been feeling so out of it. All I notice is that time keeps passing and I remain stuck.
Because I’m StuckÂ
Stuck. This has been the one word that has described my life perfectly over the years. I search for answers but find none. I want to feel better but the unfortunate reality is that I do not feel anything other than pain.
And “Ungrateful”
People constantly tell me that I have everything I need in the world right in front of me, yet I feel so empty and lost. I constantly question how a good person can feel this way. Please let them see me. I have everything right in front of me, but it is still not what I want because my life has never been my own. It has always been my mom’s. How do I know what I want after never having a say, and where do I go from here?
But I Seek Truth and Will Be Seen
In all honesty, I am freaking out about what is to come. I am the most indecisive person in the world. Nothing makes sense to me. I have no clue who I am or even what I want in this life. So often I think I know what I want, but seconds later I end up changing my mind, even when I thought I was sure. Sometimes I wish I could just find someone who knew the answer I seek. Life would be so much easier if that were the case.
So Let Them See You
I am not sure I will ever know why I went through the things I did. Maybe I am better off not knowing. The one thing I am certain of is that I am hurting. This pain is immense and it always has been. I can ignore it and deny it all I want, but it is not going anywhere. I choose to recognize that today, because not being okay is okay. Sometimes you need to be honest not only with the world around you but also with yourself. It is okay to break. You don’t have to hide your pain. Be honest with the ones you love. Let them see you.
